Well that’s a fine kettle of fish!

Eminent genius and perfect prognosticator Erica Jong tells an Italian newspaper all about her paranoid delusions:

Basically, Jong says her fear that Obama might lose the election has developed into an “obsession. A paralyzing terror. An anxious fever that keeps you awake at night.” She also says that her friends Jane Fonda and Naomi Wolf are extremely worried that Obama will be sabotaged by Republican dirty tricks, and that if an Obama loss indeed comes to pass, the result will be a second American Civil War.

Among other chestnuts she throws out for the world to see:

“The record shows that voting machines in America are rigged.”

“My friends Ken Follett and Susan Cheever are extremely worried. Naomi Wolf calls me every day. Yesterday, Jane Fonda sent me an email to tell me that she cried all night and can’t cure her ailing back for all the stress that has reduces her to a bundle of nerves.”

“My back is also suffering from spasms, so much so that I had to see an acupuncturist and get prescriptions for Valium.”

“After having stolen the last two elections, the Republican Mafia…”

“If Obama loses it will spark the second American Civil War. Blood will run in the streets, believe me. And it’s not a coincidence that President Bush recalled soldiers from Iraq for Dick Cheney to lead against American citizens in the streets.”

“Bush has transformed America into a police state, from torture to the imprisonment of reporters, to the Patriot Act.”

Obviously, Erica, Jane, and Naomi really need to take a vacation. Seriously.

Thereby absolving illegals of their illegality. I think or something.

See this World Class Idiot bloviating to the Mexican Congress here

Our product isn’t selling well, so we will make it even more painful for legitimate buyers. In a related note, Balmer announced that the floggings at Microsoft will continue until morale improves.

Ballmer blames pirates for poor Vista sales

Will crank up the WGA
By Nick Farrell Monday 19 February 2007, 15:50

THE SHY and retiring, softly-spoken CEO of Microsoft, Steve “Sounds of Silence” Ballmer is blaming software pirates for Vista’s poor sales.

LONDON, England (Reuters) — A 63-year-old British hospital consultant is set to become one of the world’s oldest mothers after undergoing fertility treatment, the Italian doctor who treated her said on Thursday.

Patricia Rashbrook, a child psychologist from Lewes, East Sussex, was given in vitro fertilisation (IVF) treatment last October, Severino Antinori told Reuters.

Antinori, who said he was “excited and proud” about the treatment, gained notoriety in the early 1990s when he helped a 62-year-old Italian woman give birth following fertility treatment with a donated egg.

So great, this bird will be 82 years old when the poor kid gets out of high school. What a lovely thing to do to a child.

The doctor was very reassuring, however, when he described the criteria for the perfect mother:

“She came here with her husband, the couple love each other, she is very slim, blonde and in perfect condition, she fits all the criteria for maternity.”

Slim, blond, and perfect condition. Sounds like the perfect mother to me.

I’m amazed at all of the cover that the right wing blogosphere is giving Ben Domenech. If 1/10 of 1% of the allegations of plagiarism against him are true, he deserves much more than to just resign from the Washington Post.

Happily, Michelle Malkin isn’t one of the apologists.

In my opinion, the worst possible form of blasphemy (well, except for the real kind) is to steal the works of PJ O’Rourke.

Shame, shame, shame on you.

… this poor bastard wouldn’t be out of a job and heading for jail.

A Chantilly High School teacher accused of giving marijuana to a student was arrested at his home on Monday. Thomas Newlun, 53, faced charges including marijuana distribution and contributing to the delinquency of a minor.

According to police, Newlun allegedly gave a small amount of marijuana to a 17-year-old student after class last Friday. The boy then gave the drugs to a school security officer.

Yes, it’s true — the ungrateful little bastard narc’d him out.

I have to say, this story has all the elements of an Idiot of Note — and therefore, I hereby grant that title to Mr. Newlun. Grats on a job well done.

Slobodan turns out to have offed himself, in an ill-fated bid to get some vacation time in Moscow. That’s about the most perfectly fitting thing that’s happened in international politics in a long damned time. What a dipstick — he probably would have gotten off with 5 years probation and having to register as a “genocidal maniac” after his release.

Woops.

THE HAGUE (Reuters) - Slobodan Milosevic took drugs that worsened his health before dying in prison, a Dutch expert said on Monday, as the former Yugoslav president’s family tried to decide whether to bury him in Serbia or Russia.

Adding to controversy over Milosevic’s death just months before an expected verdict in his war crimes trial, Russia expressed its “distrust” of proceedings and pressed The Hague tribunal to allow its doctors to examine post mortem results.

Groningen University toxicologist Donald Uges told Reuters he thought Milosevic had knowingly taken harmful medicines to improve his case for going for medical treatment to Russia, where his wife, son and brother live.

This genius gives new meaning to the word “confused.” Good grief.

BELLEFONTE, Pa. — Police said a man drove 17 miles in the wrong direction on a Pennsylvania interstate before being pulled over.

State police said the Florida man appeared confused when he was stopped early Tuesday while driving west in the eastbound lanes of Interstate 80.

The trooper who pursued the SUV said the driver had a can of beer on the console and was slurring his words.

The trooper told the Centre Daily Times that when he told the driver that he had traveled 17 miles in the wrong direction, somehow managing to avoid head-on collisions with 60 to 80 vehicles, the driver seemed confused.

The trooper told the paper that the driver said, “What do you mean?”

State police were called early Tuesday morning about an SUV traveling west in the eastbound lanes of I-80 at mile marker 156. A trooper said he came upon the driver at mile marker 141. Police said John William Fisher Jr.’s blood alcohol content was measured at .216 — nearly three times the legal limit.

He was arraigned on charges including driving under the influence, and jailed in lieu of $20,000 bail.

Poor bastard is down to his last million. I feel soooo sorry for him.

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) - Former Enron Chairman and CEO Ken Lay has seen his personal fortune eaten away by the collapse of the energy trader and his legal problems, and he could be forced to file for bankruptcy protection, according to a published report.

The New York Times reported that Lay’s stated net worth is now less than $650,000, down from as much as $400 million before Enron’s downfall in 2001.

And the Times said that latest valuation is probably on the optimistic side. It includes an estimated $1.9 million held in a trust that the paper reports is almost sure to be consumed by legal fees.

If you must, just take a Xanax and chill until the plane lands already…

You may have heard about his odd complex…

Internet dating will never be the same, now that these dumbshits have put the fear of God into the web-dating public…. imagine chatting up some sexy broad over a dating service for a few months, finally manning up enough to meet in real life — only to find out that the woman you’ve been typing sweet nothings (and no doubt, more sloppy things) to is, in fact, she-who-bore-your-scrawny-ass into the world.

But do they suck enough to kill your dad?

This dipshit decided that his blowing it at school was bad enough to murder his father to avoid the idea that he might actually… omg… get grounded or some such bullshit. To compound his idiocy, he couldn’t even figure out that perhaps the authorities might notice that although his father’s body had burned up, his skull had .45 caliber holes in it.

Sigh.

Too bad the Golden State doesn’t allow the death penalty for juveniles. This is definately one gene line that needs to end. Hopefully life in prison without parole will come along to Darwinize this particular thread of humanity.

I won’t hold my breath.