Just got this doozy in the Junk Email box — pretty classic, figured I would put it out there. Remember, kids, no one is going to give you a commission to “bring their money” into the US. No one. At least this letter doesn’t try to appeal to my Christian goodness or whatnot.

This one was also fun since it wasn’t addressed to me but to “undisclosed recipients”; a sloppy way of letting you know they are spamming entire continents with just one email.

From Miss Hasana Mohammad.

Country: Cote D’Ivoire.

City: Abidjan Ivoire Coast.

Hello dear,

Dear with profound respect and humble submission, and I beg to state the following few lines for your kind consideration, I hope you will spare some of your valuable minutes to read the following appeal with sympathetic mind. I must confess that it is with great hopes, joy and enthusiasm that I write you this mail which I know and believe by the faith that it must surely find you in good condition of health. My name is Miss Hasana Mohammad, I am the only Daughter of my late parents Mr.and Mrs Hasana Mohammad. My father was a highly reputable business magnet who operated in the capital of Ivory coast during his days.

It is sad to say that he passed away mysteriously in France during one of his business trips abroad on the 20th May 2008. Though his sudden death was linked or rather suspected to have been masterminded by an uncle of mine who travelled with him at that time. But Allah knows the truth! My mother died when I was just 6yrs old, and since then my father took me so special.

Before the death of my father on May 2008, he called me and informed me that he has the sum of Six Million, Five Hundred thousand United State Dollars.(USD$6,500,000.00) he deposited in a private Bank here in Abidjan Cote D’Ivoire. He told me that he deposited the money in my name, and also gave me all the necessary legal documents regarding to this deposit with the Bank.

I am just 21 years old and a university undergraduate and really don’t know what to do. Now I want an honest and Allah fearing partner overseas who I can transfer this money with his assistance and after the transaction I will come and reside permanently in your country till such a time that it will be convinient for me to return back home if I so desire. This is because I have suffered a lot of set backs as a result of incessant political crisis here in Ivory coast. The death of my father actually brought sorrow to my life. I also want to invest the fund under your care because I am ignorant of business world.

I am in a sincere desire of your humble assistance in this regards. Your suggestions and ideas will be highly regarded. Now permit me to ask these few questions:

1. Can you honestly help me from your heart?

2. Can I completely trust you?

3. What percentage of the total amount in question will be good for you after the fund has being transfeered to your account and i come over to meet you ?

Please, consider this and get back to me as soon as possible. Immedaitely I confirm your willingness, I will send to you my Picture and also inform you more details involved in this matter.

Anticipating hearing from you soon.

Thanks and may Allah bless you for your concern to help an orphan like me.

Kind Regards,

Miss Hasana Mohammad

What do you think, should I write back to her, and perhaps sign the email “Undisclosed recipient”?

Just ask  Mother Janet. She and other folks are seeing bogey-men in our military.

Check out this article: Pentagon preparing clampdown on RW extremists

Who woulda thunk it?

Twelve-year-old Frankie and her mother were arrested for trespassing in a U.S. senator’s office. At least in this case the mother was punished as well.

Espeland (the mother) was told that if Frankie didn’t leave the office, she would be arrested for criminal trespass, according to the police report. Espeland allegedly told police she wasn’t going to tell Frankie to leave, and “felt it was important for her daughter to be arrested for the cause.”

…I believe that’s what we would call child abuse, folks.

No conflict of interest there,  huh?

The dingbat who stalked and harassed Nancy Pelosi (on behalf of a grateful nation, I might add) was apparently a normal, nice, decent guy until those rabid racist wingnuts at FoxNews sent him on his mission of mayhem against the Speaker.

“Greg frequently gets in with a group of people that have really radical ideas and that are not consistent with myself or the rest of the family, which gets him into problems,” Eleanor Giusti (his octagenarian mommy) said. “I say Fox News, or all of those that are really radical, and he, that’s where he comes from.”

Because, after all, reporting what’s ACTUALLY happening is starting to be enough to make people upset. Who knew?

I wonder how all this hopey-changey stuff is working out for this lady:

New Jersey woman is packing in 12,000 calories a day in a bid to become the fattest woman in the world. If I were her daughter I’d be careful not to spill any mustard on myself.

[ed: that's not the wide-angle shot, so to speak; see the original article for that kind of thing]

A Russian man died after guzzling a bottle of Viagra to keep him going for a 12-hour orgy with two female pals.The women had bet mechanic Sergey Tuganov $4,300 that he wouldn’t be able to follow through with the half-day sex marathon.

But minutes after winning the bet, the 28-year-old died of a heart attack, Moscow police said.

“We called emergency services but it was too late, there was nothing they could do,” said one of the female participants who identified herself only as Alina.

CNSNews.com – Cher: Republican Rule Almost ‘Killed Me’.

If only we’d held on a little longer… sigh

Official: Performance czar withdraws candidacy.

President Obama is having the darnedest time finding cabinet members who aren’t tax cheats. In this latest round of idiocy, Ms. Killefer, who used to be all over catching high-profile tax evaders at the Treasury, actually was stupid enough to have gotten to the point that the IRS filed a LIEN on her HOME.

Folks, the IRS doesn’t file a lien on your home until it’s the last possible thing they can do — and THEN she waited another 6 months or so to pay it off. Note that a lien is good for a 100 pt reduction in your FICO score.

Then we have Tom Daschle, who’s so stupid that he doesn’t know that compensation is taxed regardless of whether it’s cash or not, and Tim Geithner, a financial genius so important to the economic recovery that (even though he signed papers acknowledging that he needed to pay self-employment taxes on his IMF salary, he totally blew it off — and that’s not something that’s easy to do in TurboTax; you have to actually try) he’s still a keeper for Obama.

Course, with the apparent lack of compliance amongst Democrat officialdom, there’s no doubt that we’re going to need hefty tax increases, real soon.

Woowoo.

NYC cabbie mistakenly beaten by good Samaritans. This poor bastard was just trying to get his fare from some women who ran away from his cab — and was beaten bloody for his troubles by passersby who supposedly thought they were witnessing a purse-snatching.

Ack.

This site is full of tinyminds — except here, they self-report. I love it; although a lot of it is mundane, there are some really excellent self-confessed ding-dongs out there — and one can always find something frighteningly familiar in the reported adventures.

Check it out; once BlogRolling is back, this site will be on my ‘roll.

Funny everyday life quotes | jinxed.org.

On behalf of Planet Earth, I would like to once again apologize to any actually intelligent creatures in the Universe. It seems that we have reached a new low; crawling into the space between Gov. Blogo’s belly and the ground, which is no mean feat, we have:

WILKES-BARRE, Pa. (AP) — Humane officers said a Pennsylvania woman marketed “gothic kittens” with ear, neck and tail piercings over the Internet. Officers with the SPCA of Luzerne County removed three kittens and a cat from a home outside Wilkes-Barre.

Officer Carol Morrison said the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals raided the home on Wednesday after getting a tip that the woman was selling the pierced kittens on eBay.

“It’s unbelievable anybody would do this to kittens,” Morrison said.

Charges are likely against the homeowner, whose name was not released.

Morrison said the woman has a pet grooming business in the basement of the home.

I know we here at Tiny Minds like to poke fun at folks who are, well, over-the-top fat. But the alleged unattractiveness of the morbidly obese cannot hold a candle to this:

Click for even more grotesque examples of how NOT to manage your weight...

After doctors refused to further indulge a 48-year-old Korean woman’s addiction to plastic surgery, she resorted to injecting cooking oil into her own face. Before and after, below.