TINY MINDS

Archive for July, 2006

6 out of 7 defense attorneys agree that stealing the judge’s keys during your trial for theft is a bad plan.

BERLIN – A 61-year-old German on trial for theft got himself into more trouble when he stole from the judge during his court hearing, police said Thursday.

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Want to date a police officer?  This is not the way.

ALOHA, Ore. — An Oregon woman is facing charges after allegedly using 911 as a dating service, and the whole exchange was caught on tape.

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Oh, irony, thy name is Utah.

Yeah, verily, and it came to pass that the fox was watching the henhouse.

And Nephi did say to Lehi, whence that worthy was shod in Berkinstocks and cutoff Levi’s, that it was to be that… oh hell, I can’t do this. Here’s the story:

SALT LAKE CITY – The commander of the Utah Highway Patrol’s drunken driving unit has been cited for driving under the influence of alcohol after crashing his cruiser into a concrete barrier, authorities said.

Lt. Fred Swain veered off the shoulder of a highway in Draper early June 23, overcorrected and hit the barrier that separates the lanes, Lt. Doug McCleve said Thursday.

Reportedly, his wife Nikki said that she’d been expecting this. “Ever since we took on our third sister-wife, Fred’s been stinking up the place with that Demon Liquor. I think after this, we’d better head back to The Compound. Roman will know what to do.”

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A new tactic to raise sales apparantly. Buy the merchandise or “I’ll cut ya!”

FORT PIERCE, Fla. — A convenience store clerk is being held without bail for allegedly attacking a boy in Fort Pierce for not buying a yo-yo, according to police.

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Good grief.

SYDNEY (Reuters) – Police were searching on Thursday for three prisoners who broke out of jail after one of them convinced an officer to open the cell door by asking for toilet paper.The three were among five prisoners who broke out of a courthouse holding cell in Maroochydore, near the Queensland state capital of Brisbane. Two were recaptured almost immediately.

Police said one of them had asked a female officer for a roll of toilet paper but the solid cell door had no hatch and had to be opened to hand the paper in.

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