Uber Irony

Oh, irony, thy name is Utah.

Yeah, verily, and it came to pass that the fox was watching the henhouse.

And Nephi did say to Lehi, whence that worthy was shod in Berkinstocks and cutoff Levi’s, that it was to be that… oh hell, I can’t do this. Here’s the story:

SALT LAKE CITY – The commander of the Utah Highway Patrol’s drunken driving unit has been cited for driving under the influence of alcohol after crashing his cruiser into a concrete barrier, authorities said.

Lt. Fred Swain veered off the shoulder of a highway in Draper early June 23, overcorrected and hit the barrier that separates the lanes, Lt. Doug McCleve said Thursday.

Reportedly, his wife Nikki said that she’d been expecting this. “Ever since we took on our third sister-wife, Fred’s been stinking up the place with that Demon Liquor. I think after this, we’d better head back to The Compound. Roman will know what to do.”

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